Monthly Archives: November 2008

Farewell, Easy Jesus

Well, Eddie Jordan joins PJ Carlesimo on the bread line today, because his team is horrible without Gilbert Arenas.  This is, of coure, different from last season’s conventional wisdom that Gil was holding the Wizards back and they were just fine without him, because they were.  Whatever, this was a mediocre team that the front office decided was worth spending a ton of money to keep together.  They haven’t made a significant move to improve the team in a while, and now a guy who was coaching the East All Stars in 2007 (remember that?) lost his job.

Up next on the chopping block . . . Randy Wittman (*holds out hope.*)


Golden State gets Crawful

ESPN is reporting the Knicks and Warriors have agreed to swap Al Harrington and Jamal Crawford, and that it could be finalized by the end of the day today.  This might be the biggest trade of perennially underachieving disappointments since Tim Thomas was traded for Keith Van Horn (the second time.)

On the court, the Knicks address their need for an athletic true center, while the Warriors get someone to play “point guard,” if that’s what they’re calling Crawford these days, so their whole backcourt doesn’t rest on the shoulders of Anthony Morrow.  Harrington requested a trade right before the season started and hasn’t been given any playing time in recent games.  The contracts are pretty close, though Harrington’s expires a year before Crawford’s (in time for the Vaunted 2010 Free Agent Class.)

Bottom line, this puts the Knicks closer to making a move in 2010 (which will blow up in their faces down the road) and makes the Warriors not much more interesting.

UPDATE: The Knicks aren’t done, sending Zach Randolph and Mardy Collins to the Clippers for Cuttino Mobley and Tim Thomas.  With Thomas coming back to NY and Mobley just missing out on a long-awaited embrace with Steve Francis by a few years, that puts the Knicks about $16 million closer to being ready for the 2010.  As for the Clips, they will apparently do anything you ask them to, because why not?

The Secret to Mark Cuban’s Success

Pictured: Cuban dumped for this lady

It was insider trading, not his TV shows or interblogs.  Apparently he dumped a bunch of shares of, which is a site where people can buy and sell mothers, and he did so with super insidery knowledge that they were raising money in a private offering.

More on this when someone can explain what any of this means in terms (pictures) the average blogger can understand.

UPDATE: Deadspin has a nice recap.  Read it here.

This damn team

Motherfuckers.  You’d think I would be used to disappointment, being a Timberwolves fan.  But it’s not even that they’re bad, it’s that they can’t close out.  A team approaching Thanksgiving with one win would not be as painful if they were getting blown out by superior teams every night.  But fuck, these have been games that even a halfway decent team could have won.  When most teams have a lead in the 4th quarter, they can at least hold on to it half the time.  Or one third of the time.  Or one fourth of the time.  But usually more than all of the times.

Fuck Randy Wittman.  Yeah, you somehow convinced this team to not give up last year when any group of reasonable individuals would have, but does that mean you have to start Jason Collins’ contract?  Fuck non-existent point guard.  Bassy can’t stay not in foul trouble long enough to start and Randy Foye is not a point guard and never will be.  Fuck Corey Brewer.  Dude, you aren’t good.  I want you to succeed, but you’re playing like someone who shouldn’t be on an NBA roster right now, let alone challenging for a starting spot.  Fuck Rashad McCants.  No, you suck.  Fuck Mike Miller.  De-fense?  Do those syllables ring a bell?  Fuck Craig Smith.  Being the funny short guy gets old when you’re one-dimensional ass hell and not good at that one dimension.  Fuck Ryan Gomes.  You can’t hold down a starting spot on THIS team?  Why would anyone want to sign you to a long-term contract?  Fuck Kevin Love.  Having one good game doesn’t mean you can take the next week off, and where are all these damn outlets I heard so much about?  Even fuck the Unstoppable Al Jefferson.  Why are you settling for these little J’s when you’re being triple-teamed?  Show some confidence in these jerks and they might make an important shot once in awhile.

I mean, shit.

Gary Payton doesn’t think Rajon Rondo deserved his ring

Did Rondo shit in the Glove’s cereal or something? I don’t get how someone who ended his HOF career hopping on Shaq’s coattails on two different teams gets to call out anyone, let alone a second year player who steeled up like a vet in the Finals against Fisher and Farmar.

And who the fuck invited Magic Map Cartographer John King to the NBATV studios? Is this what he’s relegated to until the midterm elections?

Oh, hey Tony

What’s up?   Having a good . . . oh, okay, just drive to the hoop then.  Sure.  We’ll talk more later.

Okay, you’re back.  What was I thinking about?  Oh yeah, can you believe Obama won? I’m so exci . . . oh, there you go again, to the hoop.  Well then.

All righty, as I was saying, this is the first time I voted for someone I really believed in.  What about you?  Wait, can you even vote, being French and . . . okay, you’re driving by me again.

So, Tony, Eva couldn’t make it?  That’s too bad, you guys always seem like such a happy coup . . . SONOFABITCH where did Tim Duncan come from?  If I didn’t know any better, I would think you went by him to purposely run me into his body to free you up.  But that doesn’t make sense, we’re friends!

So, overtime.  Wow, I’d be getting tired if I weighed more than 115 pounds.  You’re not tired, are you Ton . . . I guess you’re not tired.

Hey Tony, I want to ask you something about France.  Is it true that women there can just walk around with their . . . wow, I didn’t even see you shoot it that time.

Another overtime?  Wow, this game’s going to go on forev . . . oh, that was a good shot, Tony.

Good game, Tone, it was so great getting to know you.  We should hang out again soon.

Iverson to Detroit?

MLive is reporting that there is a tentative agreement between the Nuggets and Pistons to trade Allen Iverson to Detroit for Chauncey Billups and Antonio McDyess.

Wow.  If this is true, things just got weirder in both cities.  My thoughts on this as more information comes through.

UPDATE: ESPN is reporting Cheik Samb has been thrown in to the deal.  It still has not been finalized, but the Nuggets may waive McDyess once it is, which would allow him to go back to Detroit.

My thoughts: From Denver’s perspective, it fills their biggest need (outside of a non-crazy coach and an overall commitment to defense,) point guard.  In Colorado’s own Chauncey Billups, they have someone who can effectively run the floor, is a veteran leader and knows how to score.  Most of Iverson’s scoring will likely be replaced by Billups and JR Smith, who will move back into the starting rotation.  McDyess is almost certainly not playing in Denver.  He is expected to either retire or negotiate a buyout.  The downside is that Chauncey takes up a lot of cap space and is on the books through 2011, by which point he will have begun his decline.

Detroit, on the other hand, just traded away one of it’s best players for cap space, which is never a good move.  They do get Iverson to try and make a push for a trip to the Finals and a starting backcourt of AI and Rip Hamilton (or Rodney Stuckey and AI with Hamilton a sixth man) could prove very potent.  The real action will come in the offseason, as the Pistons will now have a ton of cap space to attract a big time free agent either this year (Shawn Marion, Carlos Boozer, Ron Artest) or in 2010 (Lebron James, Chris Bosh, Joe Johnson.)  But nobody ever builds a championship team via free agency, and many big signings leave teams with a good player being paid like a great one.

Clearly Joe Dumars felt the need to gamble, and the direction the Pistons take over the course of the next decade will likely be determined by this move and the subsequent follow ups in the next two offseasons.